Tuesday May 28

Breathe in.

Breathe out. 

Tap in. 

Today my root chakra points hurt. 

I am in change.

Transition.

From one home to the next.

And back again. 

I feel rested, alert, calm. 

I slept for over 10 hours. 

It is currently 5:31 in the YOW airport and I can feel myself avoiding my feelings like the plague. 

My feelings tell me that we have work to do.

To understand. 

I make the promise to myself to not give my heart away to a man, but instead integrate with the concept of connectedness with fearlessness.

After my retreat in Kazabazua I find that I do not fear men or women like I once did. 

I am comfortable being alone. In being the observer. 

I feel grounded in my own body. 

Present. 

The more I give myself permission to let go of the idea that someone else will make me whole, the more I feel whole on my own. 

I see so much sadness and anguish around me. 

Fear. 

Distress. 

Lost. 

Tired. 

A misery that looks all too familiar. 

We as humans need to wake our own hearts up to our feelings. 

It pains me to ask the question - how long have we shut our hearts off from the journey of feeling. 

We get married to get comfortable. To build a home. But in the process we let ourselves go. 

We let our dreams go. We begin telling ourselves that our dreams are no longer ours to call in because we fill our head with other people’s dreams and fears and resistance. 

We give our hearts away to those who gravitate towards limitations because the idea of freedom overwhelms our minds. 

Our bodies long to be free. 

Our hearts long to be free. 

Even our minds, with a bit of magic, long to be free. 

The process to get our dreams back to our hearts is a painful one to experience. 

Nevertheless it is meant for us to open our eyes. 

We’ve been sleeping. 

Dreaming with separation. 

It’s funny, I believe we begin to doubt our self when we become irritated with our own environment. Our minds go directly to, I hate this situation, I hate that I can’t get out of it, I must shut it down, instead of become aware of the root of the feeling - irritation. 

Irritation is an emotion that fills the body with discomfort. 

An uncomfortable body can be extremely unpleasant to experience, even when it is meant to experience. 

I’ll tell you, experiencing irritation is human, we all have it, it’s what you do with it that makes the process in your favor or seemingly against you.